Feeling like a failure is something that most of us have experienced at some time or another and that’s totally ok because if you haven’t failed, you’re either doing something wrong or you’re just not doing anything.
I know, I know it sounds so glib, but honestly, failure is the foundation for success. Failure is one of the things that helps us improve and pushes us forward. That said it’s not the most fun thing to feel like a failure.
I wanted to write about this today because it’s something that has come up for me recently in relation to my recovery from my recent fibromyalgia flare up.
Having experienced these feelings so recently and knowing that there are so many reasons we can feel like a failure, both rational and irrational it’s my hope that these tips can help you when you feel like you are dealing with failure.
1. Consider Failure as a Learning Process
If you are new to something, how can you expect it to work on the first try? You either need to learn more about what you are doing or alter your process by using the information gained from your failures. You should consider
these failures, as well as what you learn, as part of the journey to a happier life. Don’t forget that sometimes the only thing that we learn from failure is that a particular course of action wasn’t right for us, that’s still valuable information.
2. Believe in Yourself and What You Are Doing
Imagine if Thomas Edison didn’t believe that the lightbulb was possible. He probably wouldn’t have tried the 10,000 times that he tried. It’s likely someone else would have eventually come up with the invention, but it probably would have happened much later in history. He was successful largely because he believed that his inventions were possible.
If you don’t believe in yourself or what you are doing, it’s going to be difficult to succeed. Just because you have had a setback doesn’t necessarily mean that you won’t succeed on your next try. Seek out encouragement and be your own biggest cheerleader. Don’t forget to celebrate your successes no matter how small.
3. Put Aside a Lack of Belief from Others
Whatever you try, you are going to get people who are against what you are trying to do or even those who just doubt you. It could be family members or friends. Or, it could simply be negative people who you engage in casual conversation. It may be that these people are trying to protect you from potential disappointment if what you’re doing doesn’t work out. It may be that they are jealous, it may even be that they just don’t get it and don’t have all of the information that you do. It’s really important not to take on the doubt of others, especially as this can sometimes affect your belief in yourself.
4. Give Yourself Permission to Fail
When you set yourself up knowing that it’s okay to fail, it makes the process easier. Another way to look at this is to approach things as an experiment where you are just seeing what works and what doesn’t when you see how things turn out you can tweak things to get a more favourable result. Approach things in such a way that you have an idea of how you would like something to pan out but you don’t have an expectation that it WILL turn out that way. Approaching things in this way gives you a lot of flexibility and sets you up so that you can’t really fail you can only learn and tweak.
I would just like to add one more tip and this is that you always need to remain hopeful and open to possibility. Not everything will work out how you expected or wanted it to, sometimes we can see the reasons why and sometimes we can’t but either way, there is always hope for a better tomorrow.